Monday, September 28, 2009

Day #10: That thing about Big Brother is Watching? It is Really True.

Ok for weeks I have been looking for a part time job, but I decided to go on Monster.com and CareerBuilder.com and post my resume in the case someone my contact me about a better paying job altogether.  I put them out there on Saturday.  So Sunday night I'm on the phone yapping and I see a call come through from another state.  I didn't recognize the number so I thought it was a bill collector or something.  Then I see the message, "Voicemail Waiting".  I was still yapping on the phone then the call dropped.  So I decided to go and check my message real quick to see what was up.  Ok, why was it my someone from my current job?  They saw that I had posted my resume on the damn sites!   It seems that employers get a damn alert message when the you have your current company listed in your profile.  So those damn job sites lets the jobs know that you are looking and sends them a damn email too!  Motherfuccas at Monster and Careerbuilder!  They are tattletales!  I was bugging out.  So I immediately changed the status of my resumes to 'private' until I can come up with another game plan.  I like to have my resume out there because people can call me instead of me applying to everything.  Shoot, that is how I got half of my jobs, through someone seeing my resume on one of those sites.  Ain't that some shyt?!  Man you are never too old to learn something.  The job search game is really a trip right now.  But I have a way to work around this I think.  That's been my ace in the hole having my resume posted for public view.  I'll give my backup plan a shot.  I just gotta work around Big Brother eyes I guess.

My room stinks.  Why?  Because my cat's box is dirty and I don't have the money for the cat litter.  So when it gets dirty his furry ass will start peeing on the floor and in my closet with my damn shoes.  I lit some candles to mask the smell.  Yeah I know it's ghetto but what am I supposed to do?  Sit in the funk?  Then I thought that I might have some leftover quarters to buy some litter tomorrow, but that means I may not be able to buy my $3 worth of lottery tickets.  Damn, damn, damn!  Payday is three days away...I'm holding on.  I think my pay raise stuff came today at work for my manager.  I held the envelope up to the light but I couldn't see the numbers so I guess I gotta wait.  I wonder what I'm gonna get.  He may not even come in this week....boo.

Ooh blessings came to me today!  I got another check from the DOL for the program that I was participating in with my business.  It paid half of one of my employees salary.  So it was $340!  I was like great!  Thank the Lord, thank the Lord.  I didn't have that check 10 minutes and I was at the bank with it.

BOA has my cell phone number.  Crap.  Now they are calling that.  It started today.  I don't have anything to tell them right now.  I have two appointments this week.  One is with a non-profit to discuss my situation and see how they can help me with bankruptcy options.  Then I have another one with an attorney.  Man they want a $100 retainer fee at the starting gate.  That meeting may not happen just because of that so I'll just postpone it. 

I met my buddy Hugh from college yesterday and we met for a couple of drinks.  I needed that little buzz for real.  I was asking him why do people have kids since he had two boys.  I said that I wondered why my mother had me.  I mean, is this what she wanted for me?  To just grow up and work my life away and then die?  Everyday I ride the bus a.k.a the 'slave ship' that docks at the Port Authority with the hundreds of other slave ships coming from all points in NJ and PA.  The only difference is that it not just Black people on them.  Then what kills me is that at night I see the SAME folks that I saw in the morning boarding the slave ships again to go home.  This can't be my destiny!  Now I understand why people become bums sometimes.  They don't have to worry about bills, being to work on time, etc.  They are a truly free and I must admit I might be a little jelly (jealous) of that.

I'm telling you, this time next year things better be happening for me.  Otherwise, I might be outta this area because I may as well go back home if I'm going to be in NYC just to work a job.  Shoot I can do that in Chicago and be close to the fam and some Chi-style hot dogs and pizza.  Big decisions to make.


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